Provocative Blog Title About Modesty and Culture.

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Today on my ride home from teaching lessons I saw a womanly figure in my peripheral vision. She was laying in the grass soaking up some sun. I didn’t want to stare so I just glanced. At first I couldn’t really see what was going on but upon a second glance I noticed something. Breasts. She had two of them. She was sitting with another human being but I wasn’t able to identify the gender. I guess I wasn’t focusing on the other figure. This all lasted about 1.5 seconds and as I rode off I thought to myself, “What’s wrong with that?”

The answer is nothing. She didn’t hurt anyone. She probably just wanted to feel the sun all over her body. I’m a dude so it’s pretty much acceptable for me to bare my (super hairy) chest whenever I want to as long as I’m outside. It’s weird that it’s different for girls.

One of the really cool things about Germany is that this sort of thing is no big deal. I’m sure that no one went up to the woman and asked her to cover up for any reason. She wasn’t causing anyone to “stumble” and if someone did stumble in any metaphorical or literal way because of her choice to not wear a shirt, it would have not been her fault.

Recently, I’ve been thinking a lot about slut shaming. It’s this thing where something horrible happens to a woman and she gets blamed because of her appearance and or past sexual history. We see this ALL OF THE TIME. If a woman is attacked or harassed all too often the first question is, “Well, what was she wearing?” This is the wrong question.

Many of you who have known me for a while probably know that I’m pretty bashful when it comes to sexy stuff. I was the type of guy who would turn away when I walked by Victoria Secret because I would feel embarrassed. For a number of years now, I’ve decided to think about this differently. I came to the realization that sexuality is just a part of life and that I shouldn’t shy away from it or feel ashamed for having thoughts or feeling feelings because they are natural.

I’ve seen some talk recently about the importance of modesty. Some quote the bible and talk about how women are responsible for not causing their ‘brothers’ to sin. This is one of those things that really reveals the age of the culture of the bible. People still think this way and I think that one of the main influences for this is the adherence to ancient religious texts.

A friend of mine shared this today and although it’s written from a Christian perspective, my contrarian mind can’t think of much to say about it other than, “Hell yeah man!” I couldn’t agree more.

http://natepyle.com/seeing-a-woman/

6 thoughts on “Provocative Blog Title About Modesty and Culture.

    1. Hi Gordon. I purposely omitted any mention of hotness in this post. You could argue that there was an implied qualitative assessment regarding the woman’s hotness in which case you’re right to object. Your objection however would in essence, punctuate the message that I’m trying to share. Either way, thanks for your input. I often enjoy your thoughts over on Robin’s wall.

  1. I remember being in Ecuador, and one of the guys in our group talking about an old woman sitting topless in the sunshine, and how “I bet the sun on her chest felt great.” He wasn’t being sexual or creepy, just stating an observation. And then there are the topless beaches in Portugal where my mom saw grandmothers and granddaughters topless, holding hands and playing in the sand. Oh the subjectivity of modesty! And our American culture definitely tends to oversexualize breasts. Which brings up the shame aspect, the other prong in the sting of so-called “modesty culture”- sometimes causing shame in young men for thinking or feeling anything sexual, instead of teaching them how to view those thoughts in a healthy way! It’s interesting that when the Bible talks about modesty, it’s not even talking about covering up. It talks about not flaunting wealth and fashion in an effort to out-show other people. And the not causing one’s brother to stumble thing is so out of context when people apply it to women covering up in order to protect men.

    1. You’re right about how modesty is completely subjective. I like that you think that the bible is talking about not flaunting wealth rather than modesty. I agree with you but I think that people will always get this wrong as long as people are afraid to think for themselves and come to their own conclusions about morality.

    1. I see your point. Thanks for the feedback, Gordon. I’ll be more careful about my titties…I mean titles in the future. (I’m so sorry about that. I just had to.)

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